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« Hongbao for a Chinese Wedding in Shanghai | Main | Its Snowing in Shanghai ! »

12 November 2009

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Fool

Ha Ha,
This is really true. I'm actually in Shanghai right now and had an experience of my life!
I just arrived from Europe and had a walk on Nanjing Lu when a fantastic woman came up and asked me a few questions. After 2 minutes we entered a tea house. (Why didn't my brain stop me at that time? Since I read of this several times and especially since I´ve been to China atleast 20 times the last 7 years.)
But she was so great looking and had a charm that no man can resist. But it was in someway thrustworth and not too pushy.
I've never cheated on my wife since I love her most of all, but I thought i could kill a few moments of lonelyness with her in the tea house.
It started very nice, turned into thoughts I haven't had in many years, bacame a shock but had a happy ending!!
I ordered coffee, asked for american coffee for 38 RMB but she convinced me that 'blue mountain coffee' was better. 68 RMB!!
We got what we ordered together with a plate of fruit and 2 plates of nuts. And a few glasses of some whiskey/burbon that tasted better when you poured Coke into it!
Anyway, I thought it would end up like 500 'rmb something, and it could be worth it...
I gave her a notice that I could be in trouble when paying the bill. But she didn't think so.
We continued our good time together, after a while we come into the subject, sex... It was like on a european club coming close to time for going home. She said that the Chinese way was to order tea for calming down the stomach before going to my hotel for some good time.
Together with the tea we got 8 glasses of Whiskey/burbon (same shit as last time). I refused but she started to poor everything into 2 bigger glasses.
We continued the conversation. Guess what we talked about? SEX, of course.
My lucky star was that I never bring more money than what I think I would spend that evening, and never any credit cards!! 200 RMB. She got that message quite early in the evening. Before we emptied the glasses she said that she has a friend that really would like to participate in the fun we all would have. At that moment I understood what fool I was.
She had a proposal that she would leave her stuff at the tea house and make me company to the hotel and after returning with my credit card we would go back to the hotel for some really hot things... As I already(!) had figured it out I wanted to check the reciept (Fa piao in Chinese). They didn't like that, but summarized a few things, fruit 130 RMB etc. I insisted of having a total sum. After a few moments they summarized it to 6300 RMB!!!!!!
I got a little upset and when we left the bar we had one rather big Chinese in company. I told her that she had to pay her part and just after a few moments of complaining she approved that...
Back on the street I was thinking that this is something that the police probably would like to know more about. (Still thinking that I had to pay 3200 RMB for 2 h conversation)
My lucky star was here. After 50 m on Nanjing Lu we saw one of these battery driven "golf-cars" with 1 police man and 3 officials. Unfortunately he couldn't speak a word of English. But he showed me a card from his chest pocket (like a referee shows a soccer player the red card when it's time to leave the game)-
It said that it was prohibited to buy fake copies of clothes in China. ( I am wearing a Lyle&Scott shirt bought in Europe!!!) The girl talked to the police and she convinced him that we first should pay the bill and after that go to the police station. I refused. At that moment she got really upset and grabbed my glasses. First I tried to take them back but all 4 "policemen" got upset. Next move from me was just to block her way. I know that many officials in China are corrupted and I was not sure who they trusted.
The police told me to jump into the car and she shouted f**k you at me and that they would find me. We went off and I had no idea where the police would bring me since we couldn't talk.
First time I understood that I would get out of this was when they stopped at a crossing just "out". I ran to the hotel. And here I am, quite shaky but the happy ending is that I got quite a jag, and completely for free. I didn't have to pay a single RMB!
But the important thing in China: If something seems to be better than what it seems to be, it isn't.
And remember, don't get drunk with your credit card available!
By the way, I still love China but I got an experience that I wouldn't dream of!!
And this happened 8 PM a Sunday evening...

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